“My American Dream Baby”
The Ren-Kaplan family and their little miracle, Max; Gainesville, FL

Each of us who faces the fear of infertility has moment of quiet desperation, wondering if the joy of parenting will even be ours to share. My feeling of hopelessness ultimately came in a crowded hospital in my original hometown of Chengdu, China, where my husband and I were visiting my family.

Like the diagnosis given earlier by my OB/GYN back home in Florida, a Chinese specialist said both of my follicle tubes were blocked—we could not get pregnant after 2 years of trying.

I’d hoped that a second opinion, spoken in my native tongue, would somehow be magically different. But reality set in when Dr. Wu’s diagnosis reinforced that of my doctor in America. Five-thousand years of Chinese medical history, nor the well-meaning advice of ancient herbal remedies offered by family neighbors, would ever help me get pregnant.

As I returned to the hospital waiting room, happy babies were seemingly everywhere at that pivotal moment, with their content parents. Sadly, painfully, I saw their love for each other but believed I would never be a mother too.

Children were the pieces missing from my American dream. I first came here for graduate study in 1996. A mutual friend introduced us and John and I quickly fell in love. I envisioned an ideal American life with 2 or 3 children (instead of only 1 allowed by the Chinese government) running through a beautiful, lush garden.

After our return, we decided to visit Dr. Young, a mature, wise-looking man who actually looks the famous, fictional TV doctor, Marcus Welby. With an encouraging smile, he put us at ease. “We have powerful medical advancements that can help you.” He recommended that we see a reproductive endocrinologist and fertility specialist.

Our hope began anew as we met Dr. Williams and discussed options. I considered having a laparoscopy to try to unblock my tubes surgically as well as treat a mild case of endometriosis, a possible contributor to infertility. Yet, we felt we did not have the luxury of investing more time by going through further treatments. I was 34, and knew my chance of getting pregnant, whether naturally or with assistance, would begin diminishing after 35. For us, it was a clear choice to go straight to IVF.

Our IVF plan was at first postponed by surprising good news—we had been given an adoption referral. Suddenly, we hastily again packed our bags for China to pick up 14-month old Carina. Her joyful arrival reduced our anxiety. Two months later, we began the IVF cycle. When nurses taught us how to mix and inject BRAVELLE^® and REPRONEX^®, for the first time I was actually eager to stick myself with needles!

The process actually turned out not to be at all stressful. Every evening, after Carina’s bedtime, I would go to the bathroom, mix medications, and get help from John with the brief injections. The process was simple and the needles were not as intimidating as I would have thought. The doctor told us my ovaries reacted terrifically to the stimulation process—11 eggs were harvested, 10 fertilized.

Ten days after the transplant, we got the phone call that led to Miracle Max. “Congratulations—your test is positive,” said nurse Jean, who by then had come to feel like a friend. John ran to me. We embraced lovingly, knowing our dream was actually within grasp.

Then, just weeks later, we nervously held each other’s hands as we watched the monitor screen in the clinic. John and I thought we did indeed see a miracles as we watched in awe—a tiny heart was beating! “It looks perfect,” Dr. Williams said, smiling. “We can send you over to your regular OB—you’re now just another normal pregnant woman.”

Baby Max Jieming Kaplan arrived on his due day. He was named after John’s grandfather Max, who, as a baby, emigrated from his native Ukraine to New York’s Ellis Island with his parents.

Max is now 4 months old—beautiful, bright-eyed, and healthy. As I write this, I’m glancing to the backyard and see a smiling father playing on the hammock with his kids—proud big sister and giggling little brother.

What would have happened if I had never come to America? I’m lucky, I know, but believe that luck, our faith, and the miracles of medical science have together helped our family’s love grow across the continents.

Now, if that feisty little Max would soon learn to sleep through the night, all will truly be right in the world!