“Cycles of Hope”
The Merchan family and their little miracle, Catalina; Douglaston, NY

Imagine feeling immeasurable joy and excitement, while also experiencing deep despair and hopelessness at the same time. These are the painful and conflicting emotions that formed the “roller coaster” we endured during the nearly 6 years that preceded the joyous conception, pregnancy and birth of our “Little Miracle,” Catalina Jaden Merchan. Amazingly, every bit of angst, sadness, fear, inconvenience, expense, sacrifice and conflict we experienced has all but vanished now that she is here. But, the journey was one we will never forget.

For me, it all started when I finally found the man of my dreams. You see, I was well into my 30’s and keenly aware that my “biological clock was ticking.” Sure, I told myself that many women have children at this point in their lives and tried not to be too worried. That is, until I learned that my dream man had undergone a vasectomy 12 years ago, after the complicated birth of his second child with his former wife. There was no denying that this posed a new and serious challenge to my lifelong dream of being a mother and conceiving a child with him! Thank God, he was willing to do anything possible and my hope was restored.

In 2003, even before we were married, my husband had a vasectomy reversal and we were overjoyed to learn that it had been a success! Unfortunately, our excitement was very short lived. Only a few months after the surgery, we were told very matter of factly that he had experienced scarring at the surgical site and that there was now a zero sperm count. We were also informed that there was “nothing” that could be done and that we should, essentially, abandon our hopes of conceiving a child together. The trauma and devastation we felt, the tears and hugs we offered each other in the car outside of the doctor’s office after hearing this prognosis, the hopelessness – this will be with us forever.

Unwilling to give up hope, we consulted with another urologist (one who had notorious surgical skills, optimism and a good bedside manner). True to his reputation, my dream man stepped up to the plate again, undergoing a second vasectomy reversal in 2004. Another success! Well, sort of. This time, we were told that while sperm was present, the count was quite low and, as a result, our chances of conceiving naturally were very slim. Still, the DNA was there!!

At this point, our decision to pursue in-vitro fertilization was easy – especially after learning that our health insurance would cover several attempts at this amazing medical procedure, including medications! Of course, there was apprehension about the administration of daily shots, the possible hormonal and physical changes, the retrieval and transfer procedures, and incorporating the whole world of fertility treatments into our daily lives, but there was more than enough excitement to propel us forward.

The first two cycles, spanning the course of several months, were huge disappointments because I produced very few eggs, only one of them fertilized and that one stopped dividing before becoming a viable embryo even worth transferring. We soon learned that this particular fertility center was unwilling to alter the medication protocol they had designed for me, and so we made the difficult decision to start all over again at East Coast Fertility, which we had heard impressive things about (founded and run by Dr. David Kreiner.)

Dr. Kreiner earned our eternal confidence and complete trust very quickly. Right away, he determined that Bravelle and Menopur were the best fertility drugs for me. He was right! During my first cycle at East Coast Fertility (third cycle, in all), I produced more and better eggs than Dr. Kreiner had even predicted I would. Unfortunately, the low sperm count issue remained a real challenge.

The next year was challenging, for sure, but my husband continued to be an incredibly supportive, willing and encouraging partner, undergoing countless semen analyses, drinking a vile-tasting (but effective!) health supplement two times a day to increase the sperm count, and consoling me like only he could after each failed cycle. Throughout it all, we continued to believe in Dr. Kreiner’s prognosis, treatment plan and new drug protocol and held onto our hope and optimism. During the fourth cycle, I actually got pregnant and although we were devastated when we miscarried after only 8 weeks, we were encouraged to see that Bravelle and Menopur stimulated my body to produce enough quality eggs to get us pregnant!

In the Spring of 2005, our sixth cycle was the charm. While we firmly believe that it is God who is ultimately responsible for bringing us our little miracle, we know that Bravelle, Menopur and Dr. Kreiner worked miracles here on earth. We honored God by giving our daughter the middle name, Jaden, which means “God has heard” in Hebrew, but we extend our deepest gratitude and all of the ‘human’ credit to Dr. Kreiner & the staff at East Coast Fertility and to Ferring Pharmaceuticals for making Bravelle and Menopur available and part of our fertility treatments.

I will forever be in awe of my daughter and eternally grateful to the creators of Bravelle and Menopur for helping me to become her mother. She is 6 months old now and, in my humble opinion, she is perfect in every imaginable way.