“If I Knew Then What I Know Now”
The Williamson family and their little miracles, Kiera and Kasey; Osceola, WI

We are a happy family of four and I feel like the luckiest mom in the world. We don’t know why we were unable to conceive naturally, but my life has been enriched, blessed and turned around through our experience. Parenthood is a journey, and I’ve learned that every day we try to teach and nurture our kids, but somehow they too, teach and nurture us.

My journey started with my husband. “I struck gold”. I knew from the moment I met him he was the one. We married at 29 and wanted to have kids right away. What could stop us? After a year of ovulation kits and temperature taking, we followed up with our doctors. We learned that my husband had low sperm levels. After many appointments, we were referred to RMIA. I remember the feeling of emptiness of the thought of “no kids”. RMIA turned our tears into hope. Dr. Stassart and his staff provided us with a plan which included Bravelle and Menopur. The medication regimen was made very easy. Mixing the medications was very simple, and I had minimal adverse reactions to them. We responded well to Bravelle and Menopur and they transferred two embryos. Emotionally it was challenging but successful! Kiera Jean Williamson was born June 28th, 2005. My husband and I were very happy and felt blessed but we wanted a sibling for Kiera. We decided to embark on another IVF cycle which included Bravelle and Menopur. In response to the meds, they transferred two embryos. RMIA, Dr. Stassart, and their incredible staff were so supportive and made our experience successful again! Kasey Charles Williamson was born October 25th, 2007. The following is what I’ve learned about parenthood.

Marriage is the family Foundation: Parenthood is a journey of wonderful experiences, emotions and challenges. I have learned that my marriage is strengthened and I can tell/talk to my husband about anything and we can do many things together as a “team”. If you continue to invest the time into your marriage, your family will be rewarded. I see my husband now as a “dad”. I’ve fallen more in love with him because of how he is with Kiera and Kasey. He may do things differently-and that’s o.k. I would encourage other moms to do it daddy’s way once in awhile.

They are your responsibility: Parenthood is an incredible responsibility. You will see things in a different light after kids. Drivers seem more reckless and you child proof everything. You also need to be cautious about what you say. Beware, kids hear everything and they may amaze you with their words.

Parenthood is a sleepless state. You will find you can sleep in many positions and places (ie. in a rocking chair, kids snuggled next to you in bed). Your nights may seem like a three ring circus and you will be sleep deprived. It’s temporary; you will find energy deep within yourself. I know it can be challenging. Call on others, family and friends and plan a mini break. I recommend do at night what works best for your family. If that means kids in bed – that’s ok.

Let go of the little things: Parenthood is a journey that leads you to let go. Your home may not be immaculate, but if you do it right, your kids will love it and always love to “come home”. I would encourage others to let go of the small things. Dusting and cleaning in the corners perfectly. I remember wasting a lot of mental energy on the fact that my house wasn’t immaculate and things in order. My house is tidy, not perfect, but I feel I’m more fun to be around as a mom.

Queen of Taskland: You will be a queen of multitasking. Your skills will develop so that you can make a peanut butter sandwich, nurse the baby and talk on the phone. Kids do require you to do multiple things at one time; just try to keep it manageable. You may feel like your running in circles from the continuous spin cycle of caretaking. It can leave you feeling frustrated, tired and numb. Try to slow down once in awhile for the important things. Multitask the little things like throwing in laundry, starting supper in the crock-pot, paying bills while calling your friend for a play date. Don’t overbook yourself or your kids so that you can’t enjoy what your doing. Some of your best days are when nothing is planned. I do recommend when you are out and about, always have a diaper bag packed, a grocery list for the store, and snacks in the diaper bag for the meltdown low blood sugar moments, and not trying to shop during naptime.

You’ll make incredible friendships: The people and friends you make through parenthood are incredible. You may feel like the only mom struggling with feeding, but other moms really do understand. Reach out, make new friends, and listen to their advice. You may even have some for them.

Kids don’t come with a manual: There is no learning curve with raising kids. By the time you master one thing, its over. Your expertise at changing a diaper on a wiggly kid vanishes when they move to underwear. You’ll never feel quite on top of things.

Change is good: I’ve come to realize that parenthood changes you for the better. You sincerely want to be a good role model for your kids. So you do things like “eat healthy” and reach out to others, and donate your time. You see the world is a bigger and better place because of you and your kids.

Parenthood will come with its challenges. Your children will test your patience…even publically in the store or market. Remember you’re the parent and stay firm. You will develop this clever mindset to always be three steps ahead of them…Preemptively diffuse a meltdown in the store, or tears in the car because you forgot their blanket. You will become a champion of trying to plan ahead. You will find your mind does not stop even when you go to bed. You will feel helpless at times and you won’t have all the answers. Your child will be teased, hurt, and frustrated. Just keep showing them you love them.

In my three years of parenthood experience, I would offer this advice: try to keep as balanced as you can.

-take time to invest in your marriage with laughter and romance it’s the foundation for your family.

-there will be challenges and feelings of being overwhelmed, your kids will test your patience. Take a deep breath, one minute at a time, talk to other parents and make friends or play groups. It’s healthy for you and the kids.

-be a good role model. Speak kindly, eat right/exercise, love one another, your kids are sponges and they will pick up on these things.

-force yourself to back off. The more you let them learn and grow independently, the more sufficient they become; which is how it’s supposed to be.

-you will be sleep deprived and exhausted: find time for your own mental well being, call on family or swap sitting with friends.

-when your kids ask “will you play with me?”, do it, they grow up too fast. Live in the moment, the dishes can wait.

-let go of the little things: your home may be “a little messy” but its home.

-our job of parenthood is to guide our kids through life. Make it what you want…Happy & Fulfilled!!

There are countless wonderful reasons I love being a mom. There are also a few harsh realities. I’ve learned and encouraged others to embrace all the challenges, love, and laughter that come with parenthood. Yeah- if I had known I’d be sleep deprived and my mind going every way I’d have “banked” hours sleeping and do yoga. But instead I’ll count my blessings. I give thanks to my family, RMIA and the pharmaceutical companies. I have my “pot of gold” snuggled right between me and my husband. I’ll take a moment to bask in the riches before I hear “I want pancakes mom.”