“The Bumpy Road”
The Cantos family and their little miracles, Caitlin, Lauren, and Julia; Mission Viejo, CA

Infertility has been such a journey for us. For so many years we told ourselves that it was just our timing that was off. Everyone kept telling us “relax and it will happen.” Well, when it’s not happening, there’s nothing relaxing about it!

Our story starts in 1993. After graduating from college, I married my high school sweetheart. We had been together by then for eight and a half years! We knew we wanted to wait a short time to start a family so after a couple of years, we stopped using protection and really thought pregnancy would just happen. For the next four years, I kept waiting, month after month. By 1997, we had to admit to ourselves that it wasn’t going to just “happen.”

Still, with job changes and a move, getting pregnant was getting pushed back. When we did finally get back on track, it was one medical issue after another! My doctor prescribed Clomid to deal with my inconsistent cycles. Then my husband was diagnosed with vericocele and surgery was recommended and performed. Then I was diagnosed with endometriosis likely blocking one tube completely. I underwent a laparoscopy to correct the blockage but was told the chances of the blockage recurring were great. Then we were faced with sperm count and motility issues. The list of problems seemed endless!

We also did not let our family or friends know what we were going through. I can still remember the day that I had the laparoscopy procedure. It was scheduled for 7:30 a.m. I was home by 11:00 a.m. and resting. By 6:30 p.m. that same day, we attended the birthday celebration dinner for my brother-in-law’s 25th birthday. We didn’t tell anyone that just 11 hours earlier, I had undergone a medical procedure! To them, we were just a couple that enjoyed being childless and carefree. I secretly dreaded family gatherings. Inevitably, someone would come up to me and ask, “What are you waiting for? It’s time.” If they only knew.

We had somehow arrived near the end of 2002 and I was still not pregnant. Looking back, the nine years spent trying went by in the blink of an eye. After three unsuccessful cycles of IUI, I needed a break! I did nothing for several months. By December, I willed myself to call the Huntington Reproductive Center on the recommendation of our friend who was in sales for infertility medications. We met Dr. Jane Frederick and were immediately optimistic that there was hope for us yet!

We started treatment in May 2003. The timing and scheduling of the shots were a challenge. I couldn’t give them to myself and I’d be lying if I said they weren’t painful. There were some nights it took two to three attempts! Thankfully, I responded well to the medications and everything progressed in textbook fashion. Thirteen eggs were retrieved and by the morning of the transfer, we found out eleven fertilized. We made the decision to transfer two embryos.

On the night before the scheduled transfer, we went out to dinner with family to celebrate yet another birthday. After dinner was over and we all made our way to the parking lot, we finally told our family about the procedure. They were shocked to learn that we had been undergoing infertility treatments for the better part of 8 years! They had a million questions about the transfer. I felt this sense of relief when it was finally out in the open.

After the transfer, I remember going home and lying down. Lying down might not be the accurate description as I had my legs straight up in the air for long periods at a time. I kept thinking that I wasn’t going to let gravity work against me!

Two days prior to my pregnancy blood tests at the clinic, I started doing home pregnancy tests. Three in all! Each one came up POSITIVE!

We renewed our wedding vows on our tenth wedding anniversary on the beach in Hawaii. I was four months pregnant. Onlookers were probably thinking that I got pregnant and now had to get married! Caitlin Mei was born on her due date, February 25, 2004.

Following an unsuccessful frozen cycle, we did a second round of IVF in 2005 and became pregnant with fraternal twin girls. Julia Rose and Lauren Grace arrived on April 29, 2006.

The road to parenthood was a bumpy ride that took only ten years, five months! Parenthood is so much more than I ever expected. My kids make me laugh everyday and have almost make me forget how hard I worked to have them! My advice to all of you who want to be parents, don’t give up, work with positive people, and keep the faith.